You know you’re living in the 21st Century when:
- You try to enter your password on the microwave.
- You haven’t played solitaire with real cards in years.
- You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.
- You e-mail your buddy who works at the desk next to you.
- Your reason for not staying in touch with friends is that they do not have e-mail addresses.
- When you go home after a long day at work you still answer the phone in a business manner.
- When you make phone calls from home, you accidentally insert a “9” to get an outside line.
- You’ve sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three different companies.
- Your company’s welcome sign is attached with Velcro.
- Your resume is on a diskette in your pocket.
- You learn about your redundancy on the 11 o’clock news.
- Your biggest loss from a system crash was when you lost all of your best jokes.
- Your supervisor doesn’t have the ability to do your job.
- Contractors outnumber permanent staff and are more likely to get long-service awards.
- Board members salaries are higher than all the Third World countries annual budgets combined.
- Interviewees, despite not having relevant knowledge or experience, terminate the interview when told of the starting salary.
- Free food left over from meetings is your staple diet.
- Your supervisor gets a brand-new state-of-the-art laptop with all the latest features, while you have time to go for lunch while yours boots up.
- Being sick is defined as you can’t walk or you’re in hospital.
- There’s no money in the budget for the five permanent staff your department desperately needs, but they can afford four full-time management consultants advising your boss’s boss on strategy.
- Your relatives and family describe your job as “works with computers”.
and the clinchers are…
- You read this entire list, and kept nodding and smiling.
- As you read this list, you think about forwarding it to your “friends”.
- It crosses your mind that your jokes group may have seen this list already, but you don’t have time to check so you forward it anyway.
- You got this email from a friend that never talks to you anymore, except to send you jokes from the net.
- This email has 20 different disclaimer notes at the bottom, telling you that the information is confidential, but you forward anyway.